Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
