my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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