i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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