Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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