Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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