my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
