Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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