butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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