Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
