Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
