Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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