She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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