Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
