ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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