Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard. http://tfl.nu/ezls
  Replies (9) Good night (613) Bad night (2876)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  You smell like stripper and shame

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): You smell like stripper and shame http://tfl.nu/7pqp
  Replies (26) Good night (3148) Bad night (1138)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  yeah i got into a fight with my man last night

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  why can't men just shut up and put out?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep (860): yeah i got into a fight with my man last night (860): why can't men just shut up and put out? http://tfl.nu/05si
  Replies (60) Good night (2412) Bad night (1973)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth. http://tfl.nu/mgri
  Replies (5) Good night (6914) Bad night (701)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered. http://tfl.nu/z2cy
  Replies (28) Good night (11053) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  He played with my vagina like it was a turntable

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): He played with my vagina like it was a turntable http://tfl.nu/xc9s
  Replies (24) Good night (4264) Bad night (1675)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out. http://tfl.nu/zite
  Replies (19) Good night (4732) Bad night (1236)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster. http://tfl.nu/4sze
  Replies (45) Good night (5184) Bad night (1064)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer http://tfl.nu/h8i3
  Replies (6) Good night (4335) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  is this the sara with the beer cane?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): is this the sara with the beer cane? http://tfl.nu/bsnc
  Replies (12) Good night (3280) Bad night (959)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween http://tfl.nu/sqve
  Replies (8) Good night (3077) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink http://tfl.nu/i8us
  Replies (9) Good night (6413) Bad night (1232)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink. http://tfl.nu/96yi
  Replies (1) Good night (839) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover. http://tfl.nu/c2xb
  Replies (11) Good night (359) Bad night (1160)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong http://tfl.nu/vfo0
  Replies (0) Good night (561) Bad night (388)

Randomize