We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
