You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
