i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
