I smell stomach acid.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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