She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
