Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.