i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
