Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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