Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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