this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
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I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
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Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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