At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
