Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize