I cockslap morals
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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