i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
