do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize