Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
