True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
