God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
