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• (214): View more from Texas

  btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer

  (214): View more from Texas

  i owe you one

  (469): View more from Texas

  thanks for snagging those panties for me

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  well I can't set my house on fire every night

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.

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  23 Times Kids Said the Harshest Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.

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• (631): View more from New York

  Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying

  (1-631): View more from New York

  Oh good your over him

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink

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  21 Rich People Confess The Best And Worst Things About Being Wealthy

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"

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• (315): View more from New York

  Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Your normalization of crazy is frightening.

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