i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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