they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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