I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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