fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
we made out on top of his cat.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
