My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea