All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Its about making memories worth repressing
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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