i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize