So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
