Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
