when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
