You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
