My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
