You work out of a Hotel?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
