I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
