"it" just moved
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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