I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
