did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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