fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
is it fun? or sober?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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